I like to think of myself as an eternal optimist. There is always somebody that is in worse shape than me. And the sun is always gonna come up tomorrow. I keep telling myself that this whole Plan B is gonna make me stronger. Truth is... I don't want to be stronger. There I said it.
This week has been tough. Darby came home from school throwing up Tuesday. We met with the lung transplant surgeon Wednesday. Par had a terrible day Thursday and we can't get her off of the hospital ventilator. Rodney started throwing up Thursday afternoon. Now my Mom, Gee Gee is throwing up. Uncle!
Parson has made her opinion known without question this week. She is a strong, opinionated woman at 8 months of age. "And though she be but little, she is FIERCE." She doesn't like the LTV- home ventilator. After multiple attempts to switch her back over, she is not happy unless she is on the hospital ventilator. Her doc said it is like driving a new Mercedes as compared to an old Volkswagen bug. She likes the finer things in life. Unfortunately we cannot bring a hospital ventilator home. So, we are in ventilator limbo.
The meeting with the surgeon went well. He spelled out the whole transplant process & gave us oodles of statistics. He said it is a big decision for parents to make, but there is not a decision to make as far as we are concerned. New lungs provide her only chance. The transplant committee will meet Wednesday and after that meeting we will know what we are waiting on -- Waiting to be listed, or waiting on lungs. Either way waiting.
I shared a great post on FB yesterday from Pete Wilson. He seems to be my "go to" guy right now. He wrote a fantastic book called "Plan B" that I have drawn strength from and yesterday's blog post from him was fantastic. The post talked about Easter and the events surrounding Good Friday, Saturday and on to Easter Sunday. I am SO glad he posted it yesterday because The Lord knew I needed it today. If you didn't read it, scroll back to yesterday and give it a read. It is certainly worth your time. But I cannot say it any better, so I copied some of it from Pete. Here is the truth about Saturday...
Nobody would argue that Easter Sunday is a day of celebration. We celebrate that Jesus conquered death so that we can have life. It doesn't get any better than Easter Sunday.
But we don't hear a lot about Saturday do we? Saturday seems like a day when nothing is happening. In reality, it's a day of a whole lot questioning, doubting, wondering, and definitely waiting - a day of helplessness and hopelessness. It's a day when we begin to wonder if God is asleep at the wheel or simply powerless to do anything our about our current problems.
While we don't spend a lot of time talking about Saturday, I think so much of our life here on this earth is lived out feeling somewhat trapped in Saturday. I'm trying to get to a place in my life where I can embrace Saturday. I'm trying to get to a place where I can view it as a type of preparation for what I believe God might be doing in my life.
You may currently be in the midst of a horrible, out-of-control situation. You feel as if God is not there, that there's nothing that can be done.
But here is the message of the gospel for you while you're stuck in your helpless, hopeless Saturday life: God does his best work in hopeless situations.
We worship a God who specializes in resurrections. He specializes in hopeless situations. After all, at Easter, we celebrate the fact that he conquered death- the ultimate hopeless situation- so you could have life.
His followers were dejected and dismal and hopeless- and then Jesus rose from the dead. God did the impossible and in a matter of hours the disciples journeyed from hopeless to hope-filled; from powerless to powerful. They saw him risen and everything changed. The story of our salvation was born out of extraordinary uncertainty. But that's the way hope works.
And no, that doesn't take away your cancer.
That doesn't erase the bankruptcy you're in the midst of.
That doesn't heal your broken relationship.
That doesn't replace your shattered dream.
But it can remind you that while life is uncertain, God is not. While our power is limited, God is limitless. While our hope is fragile, God himself is hope.
Your world may feel chaotic, especially when you're stuck in a Saturday struggling hopelessly and waiting desperately.
But no doubt about it, God is still in control. And one way or another, Sunday will dawn.
Yep, I am stuck in a Saturday- struggling hopelessly and waiting desperately saying that I don't want to get stronger. But a new day is dawning and it is gonna be Sunday! Easter SUNDAY!
It just doesn't get any better than Easter Sunday. My hope is fragile, but God himself is HOPE. Last time I checked, the tomb was empty. Brothers & sisters, That'll make you stronger!